And so it goes...

And sometimes things work out for the positive.

And sometimes things don't.

And sometimes it feels like things happen for a reason.

And sometimes it doesn't.

And sometimes you win.

And sometimes you lose.

And sometime you smile.

And sometimes you cry.

And sometimes your heart breaks again, even when it's already being held together with super glue and duct tape and you can't imagine it breaking into any more pieces.

And sometimes life is fair.

And sometimes it's not. 

And sometimes you want something so badly you think it's bound to happen, because there is no other way.

And sometimes even then you come up empty handed.

And that's life.

That's our life.

We came up empty handed. Again.

We so appreciate all of your support and love and good thoughts, but sadly the saga continues.

Comments

[Don't Count Your Eggs]

Thank you all for your comments. It's so very craptastic! I'm sorry to those of you also going through this and wish there was just a better way for us all to make a family. My aunt keeps saying it wasn't meant to be, and while I want to punch her in the face when she says that, I try to think that maybe one day, down the line, this will somehow make some sense. Maybe not. It makes no sense to me right now, but I keep trying to think about the bigger picture. Some how, some way we're going to have a baby. I just hope I'm not 50 by the time it happens.

[Lauren]

I am so disappointed for you. It doesn't seem fair or right that you should have yet another BFN. I am so sorry and send you much love xo

[gail]

So, so sorry. There are no other words. Praying you can keep hope alive - maybe not today or tomorrow but eventually. Eventually a glimmer will arise and your hope will be renewed and redeemed. And your arms will be filled somehow, someday.

[WBC]

I am so sorry. It is all so unfair. At the very least, please know that you have helped many of us by sharing your struggles. I just wish I could help you back on this terrible no good very bad day. :(

[Paige]

*virtual hugs*

[Rita]

My heart was pounding as I went to check your blog today. I'm so sorry. There is nothing about his that is fair. Thank you for being public about your struggles. It really helps the rest of us. I can't wait until we both get a happy ending.

[AMy]

I've been following your blog for a couple of months since our failed IVF cycle and I'm really sorry to hear that it didn't work this time. I also wanted to tell you that you have created something special here with this blog for all of us struggling through this with you. Thank you for that! I'll be thinking of you and hoping this uphill journey lightens up for you soon!! Like you've said yourself, nothing stays the same forever...

[KB]

That is a huge stinky pile of ridiculous, totally unfair BULLSHIT. It just is. And I am so sorry that you have to endure this once again. I wish I could fast forward you through whatever comes next so you can just be at the place you deserve to be, and that is the part where you DO start your family. You will get there. I feel it. And in the meantime, what you are having to endure is bullshit.

[Smile]

Fuck. I am so, so, so sorry. I've been checking in all day with fingers crossed and just really thought it was going to be happy news. Sending good thoughts and love. This journey is just gutting and hideous and painful.

[Laura]

My heart goes out to you. I'm all too familiar with how you must be feeling at the moment. On Wednesday I learned that my first IVF cycle failed. I've gone from crying nonstop to feeling numb. The only comfort I have is thinking about next steps. Yay, more injections!

Despite my growing pessimism, I'm still convinced there is a happy ending in store for both of us. Big hug to you and Noah.

[Christie]

I'm so very sorry :(. I know the place you're in and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. There are no words that can take all this pain away and it just saddens me that you guys have to keep going through such heartache. There is light at the end of this infertility tunnel...don't let it squash your soul. You are both in my thoughts and prayers tonight and please keep us posted on how you're doing. You will overcome this battle!!! Stay strong and much love!!! Hugs :)

[Samantha]

Oh sweetie, my heart is breaking. I so wanted good news for you. Lots of love and hugs, take good care of each other this weekend. Xx