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November 12, 2013


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I hope it's possible for you to try again, if you choose to. In the UK, IVF works for 1 in 3 couples. Sadly, we are in the abyss you describe so well. Post unsuccessful IVF is a strange place to be. I choose to be alone a lot, quiet, can't meditate, cook, see friends, family, feel impatient at work. I feel like I'm grieving for all the moments that will never be. A loss for something i never had. How odd! I will never be pregnant. I think I would be such a good mum! I have not succeeded. I genuinely hope you do x

Don't Count Your Eggs

Hi Monica. So sorry about your BFN. It BF sucks! It's always so shocking when you follow directions and do what the doc says and then you're shot out the other side of the experience with nothing but a bunch of bills and empty syringes. Seriously? That was it? I've had so many BFN's I don't know why I still get shocked, but I do. And then life goes on as if your heart and hopes and dreams didn't just get totally crapped on. I'm sorry, and I get it. And some how, some may we will get out of this madness. I have no idea how anymore, but we both will figure something out. It's time to heal and take care of yourself and spoil yourself and let your body rest and then you'll get back on the life raft and figure it out. We both will. Thanks for following along. Mine is not the most upbeat story but there is a lot of success out there! I promise.


Maya, my name is Monica and I just got my BFN after my first failed IVF yesterday. I found your blog and I have to say, I completely relate to you and almost everything you say sounds strangely familiar. I've been married for 9 years, I'm 36 and I've tried everything and anything you can imagine to get pregnant. IVF is my final frontier, its go time . . . go big or go home. Good luck to you and I sincerely hope everything works out for you. If I could just selfishly request that you continue writing? You're blog really gave me solace on a day like today.

Thank you!


I stumbled across your blog and we happen to be under the care of the same doc if you can believe it! We just got our bfn on our 7th ivf cycle. We have had failure after failure with other clinics but we are much older than you guys and we are a tough case! I have hope that you and Noah will succeed one way or another and want to thank you for sharing your stories! If you ever want to talk, you can pm me!


I'm new to reading your blog and I just couldn't not comment. I think you two are amazing for putting your journey out there and for providing such open and honest accounts of the hell that is infertility. I'm not sure what's on your flow chart/decision tree, but I just had a "what if" thought. What if you've come to this fork in the road and you take it -- several of the paths -- when you feel more like yourselves again, maybe you start heading down a few of these figurative paths simultaneously. Wishing you lots of love on your journey. You most certainly are not alone.

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