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April 10, 2015


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It always irks me when women act like they have an excuse to carry extra pounds because they have four children or something, but since I only have one I don't get any credit for staying relatively in shape. I imagine it's the same for women going through treatments in order to have their first: while women with infertility have even more of a reason to comfort eat, they can't use their children as an excuse when they gain weight.
After four failed IVFs and lots of cancelled cycles I am amazed by how the body can come back. Oh, and after being pregnant and breastfeeding two years! Women's bodies are amazing! We can't let the culture forget what amazing things our bodies can do!
The emotional roller coaster of IVF made me comfort eat more than the hormones, I think. I think it's in our heads - and in our culture - that the hormones make us want to eat chocolate or something. But just as pregnancy should not be an excuse for eating tons of ice cream and gaining too much weight neither should IVF be an excuse. This is what I tell myself. I know it sounds really harsh but in the end you will not have five or ten or twenty pounds to lose after the pregnancy or the IVF, so you will feel better than if you had let yourself be fooled by this idea that you can eat and eat without consequences. There is no need to wear a banner of extra pounds to show the horrors of infertility you have been through. Take care of yourself even more than if you were not dealing with it all. I don't mean this to sound harsh, it's just my opinion and a choice I made - to not let the sadness of infertility be an excuse for gaining weight but instead kind of conquer it by saying, "you can't get me down, I will look good even as I go through this grief"


Maya - I just want to say thank you for keeping to blog after Momo's birth. It is really helpful to hear what it is like to FINALLY have a baby after IF treatment. So many people blog their IF journey but then stop blogging as soon as they have their baby. It really is so affirming to hear your experiences with Momo and what it is like raising her after your incredible IF journey to get her! Thank you so much - it is giving me hope that it really is all worth it - as we continue our IF journey (2 years in).


Although the physical trials pale to the emotional of this journey they only add to hardship. It is so hard when you feel like your body is betraying your mind/ diet/ wishes etc. I found it a slow recovery after my miracle baby boy but was happy that all I wanted was a fit and functioning body- had zero attachment to a stretch mark free bikini body. Hope you are settling into the breast feeding and remember that this only gets easier day by day. I can promise you that. Xo

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