She's yanking on her ears

Momo turns five months old tomorrow. I can't believe it. She changes so much every day and seems to have a new "thing" every week. Last week it was the sexy dance, where she would put her hands behind her head like a 1950's bathing beauty and kick her legs and dance around. Pure joy, just working things out in her little body. 

This week she's slightly less joyous because I think she's getting a tooth. While she's still in good spirits, there's a lot of drooling and gnawing and grunting happening, then last night she started yanking on her ears. A girlfriend of mine warned me that the tell before a tooth is the ear yanking, and sure enough Momo was pulling away at her lobes as if she was bewildered. "What's happening?!!" 

I held her and rocked her best I could as she spazzed out in my arms, and I thought about how hard it is to be confused by your own body. How frustrating it is to not know what's going on. To have pain and not know why or when it's going to end. To feel uncomfortable and so annoyed you just want to pull your ears off. Sound familiar? Perhaps this link from Momo teething to the IF experience is a bit of a stretch, but in the moment it helped me have empathy for her. That's one of the unintended consequences of living on IF Island. A slightly different perspective of other people's pain and perhaps a bit more patience.

I would like to assume I would be the kind of mother who would have empathy for her teething baby regardless. And perhaps I would be. I hope I would be. But I won't ever know the kind of mother I would be if I hadn't gone through the years of struggle to get her. Maybe it has made me better, maybe it has made more more anxious, I don't know. What I do know is the feeling of wanting to rip your ears of because you don't know what else to do. And I know how important it is to have someone there to support you, hold you, and just be with you through pain.

Sending lots of love to anyone ready to rip their ears off.

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Comments

[Chon]

I love how you are a fiercest supporter for all those in the trenches. It's easy to get caught up in the bliss of a new baby and you deserve every bit of that bliss but it's always lovely to read that you still care (and this is coming from someone who made it once to the other side!)

With teething some swear by the amber necklaces - I swore by baby Panadol and lots and lots of cuddles!