Momo turned a year old yesterday.
A year.
It's been the shortest longest year of my life.
Sometimes, when I work with client's in my private practice (I'm a psychotherapist when I'm not covered in food and reading up on naps-- yup, still obsessed with naps), I do this timeline thing that I think helps put difficult times in perspective. We draw a line with birth on one end and present day on the other and start to fill in dots with important events (positive and negative). It helps to get a sense of life and things that might impact us and how we feel etc., but it also puts into perspective how a moment in time, even if that moment is a year or more, is really just a small section on this long line of events. If I did my own timeline, the dark infertility years would be a few dark circles on a longish line, with (hopefully) a decent amount of line to go. A timeline like this also makes you realize how fast it all happens, and is a reminder to enjoy every second of the good parts.
Momo just got her first dot. Well, I don't know. Maybe that's for her to decide later. But it was a significant dot/milestone for Noah and I. She can walk about 6 steps. She says dada all the time and mama when she's crying. A year ago yesterday she was stuck in my vag hole for four hours. The year before that she was a microscopic cell in a freezer and I was a ball of tears on a bed. And here she is on her birthday--nothing but wonder and joy and amazement.
And all I can do is think about the timeline of our life and our journey to her. This incredible little person that was patiently waiting for her turn to break into the world. She's a force man, a total wild spirit who wakes up each morning with a smile on her face that's ready to take on and explore everything.
The bad times feel like forever, but they won't be. The good times feel like a split second, so we have to savor. The journey to parenthood is often ugly, but at then end is a new beginning, and that's beautiful.
Sending love and luck to everyone still moving towards that new beginning.
C!!! Congrats! A strong healthy boy! How amazing. Sending lots of love to you and your family.
Posted by: Don't Count Your Eggs | April 10, 2016 at 09:25 PM
Thank you! A 9 pound 11 oz boy delivered with midwife, pitocin, epidural, went quite well considering his size! I'm giving technical details because I just can't even express the emotions of finally having our longed for second child. They've been expressed on this blog anyway. Thank God for embryo donation and adoption!
Posted by: C | April 07, 2016 at 02:13 PM
Thanks for all the birthday wishes!!
C-- Congrats! I hope all went well and your giant baby is in your arms! I'm just teasing about giant. How the baby gets here is much less important that just getting here and we all wish you the best. Maryann!!! Any day mama! How exciting. Sending love. Lou!! Yay! September....it will be here before you know it! And you get to be P over the hot summer, how fun ;)
Thanks for still following everyone. It's so nice to hear some happy ending stories.
Posted by: Don't Count Your Eggs | March 31, 2016 at 08:32 PM
Happy birthday to your special baby! Wow, one year goes fast. I am being induced at 5am tomorrow and I will get an epidural. I had a perfect natural birth - easy really - with my daughter who was conceived naturally, but embryo adoption is different. I am at my due date and the ultrasound says a 10 pound 7 ounce baby! I had a feeling this baby was big. My mother and sisters and I tend to go overdue. My daughter was almost two weeks late. I'm not taking any chances with our embryo adoption baby. Baby is big enough but my body would likely carry on pregnant at least a few days longer; after all baby doesn't have my genes. If I'm going to go medical - pitocin - I'm going medical all the way with epidural. After ivf I'm not afraid of a medical birth even if I prefer natural! Can't wait to find out the gender and the baby's actual size.
Posted by: C | March 31, 2016 at 03:01 PM
Great post as always! So happy for your beautiful girl, heartfelt wishes for her 1st birthday.
Your blog gave me strength for past few years in the painful infertility journey. Your blog gave me also idea of exploring other options, and now, 36 weeks pregnant with donated embryo we are counting seconds to meet our precious, so much loved and awaited girl.
Posted by: Maryann | March 27, 2016 at 03:53 PM
That's gone so quickly, at least to us onlookers! Wonderful picture..And thank you once again for your fabulous blog which has kept so many people sane, knowing it is not just us feeling these things. We are expecting a baby in September after DE IVF, also after 5 years of trying and four IVFs.....you, Noah and Momo have been an inspiration to me not to give up hope of getting a family. Momo is a very special little girl for that reason alone, whether she knows it or not! Happy Birthday!
Posted by: Lou | March 27, 2016 at 02:53 AM
Oh, she is beautiful, tears come for me to finally catch a glimpse of her, long life dear Momo, and plenty of happiness to your whole family!
Posted by: M | March 25, 2016 at 05:56 PM
Happy birthday Momo!!! What a happy milestone - thank you for sharing with us!
Posted by: Corynn | March 23, 2016 at 01:50 PM
Happiest of Birthdays Momo! We all followed your journey into this world and we are so happy that you have two wonderful parents who love you sooooo much!
Posted by: Lisa | March 22, 2016 at 06:41 PM